Bit of Happy #39: Be Brave

5 Nov

“The brave don’t live forever, but the cautious never live at all.”
-Timothy Luce

The other night I was talking to a friend of mine who I hadn’t seen or talked to in months. It felt like forever since I’d spoken with him last, and at the same time, like I’d just left his college dorm room and gone up the two flights of stairs back to mine. Anyway, we were both very hesitant about meeting each other because of… well, because of the way things were left between us, and because of the unknown that lies ahead. If you want to catch up on the back story, I explain a bit of it in Bit of Happy #8: Free Yourself.

Once best friends, we were now searching for a way to get back to that point – back to our ‘norm’ before the mess of whatever it was that we ‘tried.’ And being completely honest, the last thing I thought when I agreed to meet with him was that it would be completely effortless. Just like it had been before we took the leap into what ended up being an awkward, hurtful dating… I don’t even know the word for it.

The point of explaining all of this was the topic of conversation. I’ve recently been faced with a good deal of heartache. I know I haven’t mentioned it, but in case you couldn’t tell, I like to try to focus on all of the amazing things I have in life. Not necessarily what is no longer there. Each moment I spent unhappy is a moment I”ll never get back to change into a happy one, so I try to stay as positive as I can and allow the negative to fade away. Trust me, I know that can be difficult. But I believe it’s truly important to focus on the good and get the most out of what life brings you.

Anyway, he listened to everything I was willing to share about Not-So-Prince-Charming – just like old times. We were always there for each other through all of the messy dating dramas – what you commonly find in your early twenties. It was good to have him there – to have him back.

He always told me how brave I was. I don’t know if I ever really believed him when he would say it. Though, it’s always encouraging to know someone believes in you. Even if it’s only one. And in this situation, it was no different. He told me how much he admired my bravery in the way I look at life. So passionately. So fully. So innocently. The way I put my heart out there over and over with little regard to what has happened in the past. The way I refuse to allow the hurt of the last relationship to affect the new one. The way I choose to love through an open heart and mind.

“You’re one of the strongest people I know, Steph. I have no doubt that you’ll be fine given a little more time,” he said. “Just keep your chin up.”

I looked in his eyes in that moment and saw all the answers. He was right. I would be fine. He was right. With time and a little hope, I would make it through this heartache. He was right. This past relationship will not stop me from trying again. He and this quote made me realize that I was not going to live cautiously, but rather face my heartache, allow the bruises to heal, patch up the holes, and with time, I would try again. I may not live longer, but I’ll surely live a life with less regret.

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